Richard Venezky

It is with great sadness and honor that I announce the death of my father, Richard Lawrence Venezky, today, June 11th, 2004. My father was an amazing man who excelled in so many ways. He was a loving father, a caring husband, a loyal friend, a committed mentor, an inspiring teacher, an honored scholar, an avid collector, and a gifted gardener. He enriched our lives in so many ways and we will all miss him dearly. In the past few weeks I have thought about the pain of losing him and came to realize how fortunate I am to have had him in my life for so long. I realize that there will be many unanswered questions but that one of the gifts my father gave to me was the set of tools to learn on my own and the joy in doing so. I will always want to know exactly how I can best educate my children or how he made his garden grow but I will also take pleasure in knowing that he is proud of me as I go through this process of discovery. I will think of him every time I work in the garden, eat a vegetable, read a book, or learn a new skill. We love you Dad.

Much love,
Dina

We are requesting pictures and stories of Dad. These can be sent to me by email (or by mail) to be archived for the family, in particular, Benjamin and baby #2.

Information about the funeral below.

Benjamin points out a lemon on the tree that Dad and I planted when we first moved into our house in California. The tree has grown considerably since then.

Hi. It appears that I was a little optimistic about Dad getting out of the hospital in the near future. He’s in good spirits but has had and recovered from another fever. He is continuing to fight the lung issue and the doctors are working on reducing his cough. In the meantime, we are trying to limit his talking so he doesn’t cough too much. We greatly enjoy hearing fun stories about Dad that we can share with him and any entertaining movie suggestions (preferably of the “Bring it On” variety where concentration is not really required instead of anything that Dad might choose to see in a movie theater).

Thanks again and much love,
Dina

Info on Bring it On, in case you haven’t seen it.
Torrance Shipman (Kirsten Dunst) is an ideal high school girl: She’s captain of her school’s decorated cheerleading squad and has a perfect college boyfriend. But pressure mounts as Torrance attempts to lead her crew to its sixth consecutive national title. She’s determined to let nothing – not family, schoolwork, boyfriend or a talented inner-city squad with a score to settle – get in the way of winning. Starring Kirsten Dunst, Jesse Bradford, Nathan West, Eliza Dushku, and Gabrielle Union.

ps Congratulations to one of my best friend’s, Audra, who was married this weekend in Boston and has a birthday today!

Benjamin plays with chalk at GeoKids. The boots are for jumping in the mud pit the teachers make on occasion. Benjamin loves the mud…

Benjamin jumping at gymnastics. Not a great picture but he’s getting harder and harder to catch on film.

Hi -

As one of Dad’s doctors said the other day, “it looks like you dodged another bullet.” The radiation appears to be getting rid of the lymphoma. There is still concern about the fungus in Dad’s lungs but Dad may be released from the hospital in the next week or so. Dad is still coughing, due to difficulty swallowing, and it’s unclear why things are going into his airway but Mom says that he is looking better and feeling better.

We hope everyone has had a good spring and we look forward to a joyous summer.
Love,
Dina

Benjamin admires and then picks the first strawberry to grow in his garden. He hasn’t learned to use two hands to pick fruits and vegetables yet but we’re working on it.

Benjamin plays with the parachute at his friend’s birthday party.

Hi All -

The following is a message from one of Dad’s colleagues about
an award that the University of Delaware has created in Dad’s name.
Information about the award was first presented at the Festschrift
and we are all very excited about it.

Love,
Dina

ps I will be sending another update shortly.

Hi. I’ve been told that the Festschrift was a huge success and I can’t wait to see the video. Dad, unfortunately, was not able to attend. He had a fever of 104 on Friday and although it is back down, there are still concerns. I am assuming that he will be starting another round of anti-fungal drugs tomorrow and I will write again when I know more. Mom and Elie attended the dinner. Each of the participants stood up and talked about how they met Dad and the work they’ve done together. I was told that it was wonderful. There aren’t words to describe how lucky I feel and how much I appreciate hearing about it - thank you. Attached is the final slide of Roberta’s talk (I hope it was okay to distribute).

Thank you again and much love,
Dina

Hi. This weekend Dad’s colleagues are holding a Festschrift (see definition below) for him in Delaware. There are about 50 people flying in for a full day of presentations on Saturday. The plan is for him to leave the hospital to attend. We are all very excited and I wish I could be there!

Here’s to a great weekend.
Love,
Dina

Festschrift - A volume of learned articles or essays by colleagues and admirers, serving as a tribute to a scholar. ETYMOLOGY: German : Fest, festival; see fest + Schrift, writing (from Middle High German schrift, from Old High German scrift, from scr ban, to write, from Latin scr bere).

Here is the image of the logo used for the event. My cousin David painted it for my father a while ago and it hangs in his office at home.

Benjamin playing with his Thomas the Tank Engine trains on his new rug. His love of Thomas is really quite amazing.

Hi. Shortly after I wrote the previous update, Dad started to run a fever and went back into the hospital. The fever broke yesterday and the doctors performed a biopsy on the mass in Dad’s lungs today (Dad was previously on IV drugs to reduce the mold in his lungs and after significant progress was made he was put on an oral anti-fungal that may have stopped being effective). We are now waiting to hear what the doctors find. Dad is resting and continues to be in good spirits.

We continue to focus on the positive and thank you for your best wishes.
Love,
Dina

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Benjamin and Uncle Elie practice yoga. Benjamin now mentions his uncle every time he does downward facing dog.

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Benjamin goes ice skating for the first time. We are looking into double blade (bob) skates for our next trip to the rink.

I’m afraid that I don’t have good news. The chemotherapy to fight the lymphoma is not working and we are waiting to hear about alternative options. Dad is having some difficulty talking, due to the tumor in his throat, but is otherwise in good spirits. He spent part of today in the garden, which is beautiful as always (see the picture below of Dad and Benjamin from our visit two weeks ago). Benjamin is now helping in our garden and some of his strawberries are just starting to get ripe.

I will send another update once we have more information.

Thank you.
Love,
Dina

ps We had a great visit the other weekend to celebrate Benjamin and Dad’s birthdays. I’m now about 7 1/2 months pregnant and will not be flying back to the east coast until after the baby is born.

Dad, Mom, Stephen, Benjamin, and I watch the Andean Condors in the rain at the Brandywine Zoo.

Dad tells Benjamin about one of his herb gardens before we left to go to the airport.

Hi.

We’ve encountered a few complications and we’re waiting to see if the new treatments are going to work. Right now the doctor’s are trying to find a balance between the graft vs. host disease and the lymphoma treatments. Dad had the 2nd of four chemotherapy treatments for the lymphoma on Friday and we should know more in a few weeks. In the meantime, we are focusing lots of positive energy on Dad getting better.

Thank you again for your continuing support.
Much love,
Dina

ps Here are a few pictures from Benjamin and my trip to the Jet Propulsion Laboratory last Thursday (JPL is in Pasadena, CA and a friend of mine is one the current Mars mission team). It was a very exciting trip.

Benjamin tests the microphone as the Mission Manager.

Benjamin checks out a basalt similar to those found on Mars.

Hi.

I don’t have very much news and we may not know much more before Monday. The thought is that the lymphoma is caused by the Epstein-Barr virus that Dad has had carried in a dormant state since he had mono in graduate school. The virus became active when the immunosuppressive drugs that he has been taking prevented his natural ability to suppress the virus. The doctors are taking him off the drugs and then watching him. He may potentially start a new drug on Monday but we are still waiting for more information.

Much love,
Dina

Carter, JJ, and Benjamin in the wiggle wall at Trey’s birthday party.

Benjamin decorates his cake at Trey’s birthday party.

Hi Everyone.

Dad went back into the hospital today with another “inconvenience". He
has a tumor in his throat that has been diagnosed as a lymphoma (b
cell, I think). He is currently undergoing a large number of tests to
determine more information about the tumor, if there are others, etc.
Both Mom and Dad are in good spirits. We will know more soon both about
the tumor and the suggested treatment. I will send more information
when I receive it.

Please do not call the house or the hospital. It’s going to be a hectic
weekend and we need Mom and Dad to get as much sleep as possible.

Thank you for all your support.
Much love,
Dina

Benjamin starts painting after exploring the other activities on
Wednesday morning at GeoKids.

Benjamin decides to make hand prints after painting with a brush.

Hi Everyone -

Just a quick update to let you know that Dad is home from the hospital!! He is doing well, although it appears that he may have new sensitivities (stuffed nose and sore throat) so we are trying to get rid of all allergens from the house (perfume, flowers, scented laundry detergent, dustmites, mold, etc.).

We are all very excited by Dad’s rapid recovery and I am going to try to find a few times during the week for people to call when it is more likely that Dad is available. It’s still overwhelming for both Mom and Dad to receive multiple phone calls throughout the day.

I can’t end this update without mentioning how proud I am of both Mom and Dad for how they handle these inconveniences.

Thank you again for all your support.
Much love,
Dina

Here is Benjamin playing with his new stamps.

After a little practice, Benjamin starts putting the stamps on the ink pad.

He then puts the stamp on the paper.

Just a quick note to let you know that Dad had a good night (no known bleeding) and is starting on fluids today. We are all continuing to wait and see what happens. If things go well then we hope Dad can start some food over the next few days. If not, then we will discuss options. Right now, everything looks good and we are excited with Dad’s progress.

Thanks again for your support.
Dad did lose a lot of blood and is weak from not eating so we continue to request no phone calls to the hospital or house.

Much love,
Dina

Hi Everyone.

Up until yesterday it appeared that everything was going well and there wasn’t much to report. Dad seemed to be continuing his recovery, although a cold was making him tired. Then yesterday Dad passed out briefly and Mom brought him in to see the doctor. It was found that he had internal bleeding and he was admitted to the hospital yesterday evening. I was told that we would get more details this morning and at 7 AM Mom called to say that they might have to operate. I caught an 8:50 AM flight out (Benjamin was dressed at daycare and Stephen showered at his office before meeting with customers). The internal bleeding site was found while I was on the plane and cauterized. I’m now at the hospital and Dad is in good spirits. Elie is also here so we are all hanging out watching movies. It’s been several hours since the doctors have seen signs of the bleeding and once again you couldn’t tell that Dad had just had a horrible 24 hours. We are still waiting to hear more and I will send out information when we have it.

Please do not call the hospital or the house. Dad needs his rest and his throat is sore from the tests and lack of food/fluids.

Mom is also doing well and her walking has improved greatly (she was hit by a cab in NY during one of the cold spells and physical therapy is helping her to make a remarkable recovery from some muscle and nerve damage).

Much love and thanks,
Dina

Here is Benjamin at the zoo last weekend climbing on a bronze hippopotamus statue.

Hi and Happy Holidays (a bit late)! Stephen, Benjamin, and I visited Delaware over the holidays and can report that Dad looks great and continues to improve every day. His daily routine still involves medication (in IV and pill form) that takes a few hours of his time but he is also working, reading, taking short walks, and resting. Overall, he is doing really well and we are all very excited about it. Several of Dad’s doctors have recently commented on how impressed they are with Dad’s recovery (including the doctor who told us all how serious this is a few months ago). So we continue to think positive thoughts about Dad beating the pneumonia and regaining more and more of his strength. On a slightly less enthusiastic note, we did find out that Dad’s graft-vs-host is chronic. I don’t know the full details yet but we are so excited by Dad’s current progress that we are focusing all of our attention on the improvements for now.

We hope you had a great new year.
Much love,
Dina

ps On a sad note, our good family friend Peter Boettcher died of lung cancer on Dec. 31st. Stephen, Benjamin, and I went up to Northampton, MA for the funeral and we continue to send our best wishes to all of the Boettchers.

Here are a few pictures from our trip.

Benjamin running in Granny and Granddad’s yard in Kitchener, ON (Canada).

Dad and Mom heading out to run errands (Newark, DE).

Stephen and Benjamin check out the alphabet windows at Bergdorfs in NYC before going to say goodbye to FAO Schwartz and hello to the animals in the Central Park Zoo.

It looks like Dad is going to be coming home from the hospital this week!!

We are all very excited. His white blood cell count has climbed into the low range for a healthy male (it climbed from close to zero so it’s gone up a lot) and his other counts are holding (they’re low, but holding). Coming home from the hospital is a huge win in the battle but there are still many challenges left. Dad is still fighting the pneumonia and will continue to fight it for several months. Dad is also fighting some of the side effects of the drugs that are helping him fight the pneumonia. So the bottom line is that he’s doing great but will need to rest for the next few months. I think the first few weeks at home will be the most tiring as Dad readjusts to a slightly larger living space and access to real food (not that real food wasn’t brought to the hospital for Dad, just that the prix fix menu wasn’t highly recommended).

Here’s to Happy Holidays and continuing best wishes.
Thank you.
Love,
Dina

ps I am presenting at our big geology conference next week and still have a significant amount of work to do. I apologize in advance for not returning any email messages but I will forward them to Mom and Dad.

Benjamin gets ready for the Run to the Far Side (a race in Golden Gate Park the Sunday of Thanksgiving sponsored by the California Academy of Sciences and based on Gary Larson cartoons). It rained the morning of the race so I don’t have any good pictures from it (we were all soaked). Benjamin enjoyed seeing all the runners and loved the costumes.

Hi.

I’m not sure where to begin so I will try to be as succinct as I can. Dad is still in the hospital. His blood counts have been going up slowly and we are hopeful that they will continue to increase. A new concern is that Dad has pneumonia. The doctors did a biopsy on the day I flew in to Delaware and have found that it is a virulent strain in his lungs. I have been very impressed by the steps the doctors are taking to solve each challenge. The new medication is a 4+ hour IV drug that Dad seems to be tolerating well (it surprised his doctors). We are all very hopeful that the drugs will clear up his lungs but we’ve been told that it is a serious battle.

Dad looks great and takes walks around his floor during the day. The drugs make him tired and he needs lots of sleep to recover. If you would like to send something - cards, letters, or postcards would be great. He is on a restricted diet (no fresh fruits or vegetables, no peppercorns) and can not be near flowers or plants (more on food below pictures).

The most important thing for all of us to do is to stay positive - and Dad needs to be the most positive.

Thank you so much for your support.
Because of the pneumonia, it would be best for Dad not to receive phone calls (his doctors want him to take pain killers for his cough).

Thank you again.
Love,
Dina

ps I’ve switched the date in the subject line because it was confusing to some. Dad was diagnosed with AML and started his first round of chemotherapy on Oct. 11, 2002.

Benjamin and his lacrosse stick (after playing in the water with Stephen).

Benjamin in the big (rope) spider web at the SF Zoo.

More about food -
If you do send food (more for people in the area), we can not take food from Dad’s room out to the microwave or refrigerator so it would be easiest if it was in small containers. And, of course, please be super-careful about preparing the food (wash hands, don’t cook if you’re sick or anyone else in the house is sick, please don’t taste the food and put the spoon back in, etc.).

Hi.

It’s been a strange few weeks for all. Dad is back in the hospital and has been there for about a week. Dad has had two common manifestations of the GvH (graft-vs-host), the first is a rash and the second is uncharacteristic liver enzymes. It appears that both are currently under control, which is really good news. The main item that is being attended to is that Dad’s blood counts are still low.

As I mentioned in Update 31, GvH can take a long time to battle (6-12 months). I guess the strange part for all of us is how quickly these challenges appear. Dad sounded great the day he entered the hospital. The fever was a little annoying but it was down by the time he was checked into a room. It was unclear at that time how long he would need to stay and now it appears that it is going to be for a while.

Mom is bringing Dad his mail to the hospital and I will continue to forward email messages.
We thank you all for your continuing support and best wishes.
Thank you.
Love,
Dina

Benjamin (left) was a lacrosse player at a Halloween party the weekend of Oct 24th but he dropped his lacrosse stick, ball, and hat 5 minutes into the party. My plan was for him to be a frog (see below) but it was almost 100 degree F. Here he plays in the jumpolene with his friend Trey (there was also a big bouncy house that he enjoyed).

Benjamin’s frog costume from Halloween. I can’t remember what he was saying but it was funny. I also forgot to bring my camera to Trey’s house on Halloween but Ben was an adorable and energetic frog (Trey was a horse).

Hi. We just returned from Delaware and I apologize for not finding the time to send an update earlier. Dad is at home but has been diagnosed with graft-vs.-host (GvH) disease. This is both good and bad. The bad part is that it can be quite serious and Dad needs to rest, fight the GvH, and not get any infections, which would further complicate the healing process. The other bad part is that it can last for a long time (6-12 months). The good news is that most people who have had some GvH are free of leukemia once they have battled GvH. Our doctor was hoping that Dad would have some GvH last time so we’re a little excited about it (okay, maybe optimistic is a more appropriate word since we would prefer that there was some sort of magic that would make everything better right now). Dad is on steroids to help clear up some of the symptoms along with several other drug therapies. He is in good spirits, looks great, and enjoyed seeing Benjamin.

So what does that mean for all of us. Dad needs lots of time to rest and fight the GvH. It’s also VERY important for him to not have any visitors with infections. This is hard on everyone and especially hard for Dad who wants to return to his office, meetings, and other pursuits. It’s also hard to predict how long this is going to last and there is no doubt that Dad will be bored and want to talk with and see everyone, which means that we need to help him recover by letting him rest. Please also keep in mind that Mom needs to rest too. As you can see below (I apologize if you can’t see the pictures and we’ll try to post them on a website soon), Dad looks great. If you find yourself talking with Dad, please keep the conversation as short as possible. We don’t want Dad’s throat, or anything else, to get worse.

Thank you for your understanding and continued best wishes.
I will continue to forward email.
Here’s to fighting GvH!
Love,
Dina

ps Benjamin is 18 months old today.

Dad and Benjamin read an alphabet book.

Mom and Dad watch Benjamin climb out of the garden.

Hi.
On Wednesday afternoon Dad had a doctor’s appointment and was sent to the hospital when they found that he had a 102+ (F) fever. In addition to the fever, he also has a full body rash of unknown cause (both the fever and rash have been clearing up). Dad is in good spirits and will be released from the hospital once he is fever-free for 24 hours. The main focus right now is to get Dad’s blood counts back up. This means that he really needs to take it easy and let his body heal (not an easy task for many of us).

So here’s the hard part, we all need to give Dad’s body time to heal (I’m sounding more and more like some of my ‘California’ doctors). Dad loves hearing about what you are doing and I know that resting in the hospital, or at home, is not as enjoyable as the work he loves or good conversation with his friends and family. I am asking that we all give Dad (and Mom) the time needed to heal by not calling.

We really appreciate everyone’s good wishes, thoughts, and prayers. Please continue to focus your positive thoughts on Dad’s blood counts coming back up.

Thank you again.
Love,
Dina

ps I will continue to forward all email replies to Dad in a digest form.
pps Here are two pictures from last weekend. It feels like Benjamin is becoming more independent everyday.

Benjamin checks out the coral and fish at the Monterey aquarium.

A peaceful view from Pebble Beach.